Video: Finding Strength and Support After an Unsuccessful IVF


Hi.  My name is Lisa Stack, and I’m the CNY Fertility Support Coordinator.  In my Words of Support and Encouragement article this week, I mentioned that I’ve been getting a lot of support requests from clients who have been returning after a first, second, or third IVF cycle that wasn’t successful.  I know that this can be incredibly disappointing.  Even if you’re just doing IUI cycles or Clomid cycles, you get your hopes built up, a lot of confidence into the cycle, there’s a lot of hope if you’re trying something new-maybe stepping up to a greater level of technology or intensive care.  I know that it can be very disappointing if the cycle is negative.
However, I would like to remind you that we do learn a great deal about you with each cycle, especially with IVF.  If you’ve gone through your first cycle, your second cycle, and you still have not conceived yet, we’re still learning because you are unique.  Although we have many great medication protocols and treatments that we can do for many clients, not one protocol fits everybody.  We have to play a little bit and try things out, seeing if things work, seeing how you respond and really kind of assessing where we came from and where we’re going.  I know it can be frustrating, but please just be patient.  We are taking our time because we want to make sure that we do things correctly, and that we do treat you in the best way possible.
It may take a little bit of time to get the correct medication protocol for you, but every time we do a cycle, every time we do an ultrasound or blood work, it’s not just tedious work.  We are learning something from you and we’re learning how your body reacts and responds to various medications.  We learn how you react from month to month.  These are all really important details that we need to create a great picture of who you are, who you are as a family, and how we can best help you to conceive.  I know that it can be disappointing, but hang in there.  Just know that every time we do a cycle or every time we draw your blood or do an ultrasound, we’re learning and we’re getting a greater picture of who you are and how best to support your fertility.
If you’d like a little bit of extra support this month, we’ve had some great support groups, and we have some great webinars left as well; especially Dr. Kiltz’s webinar this month with Kristen Magnacca and the Interactive Fertility Support Webinar at the end of the month.  Next month, we’ll be having our great support groups as well.  So there’s tons of resources out there for you.   Go look at our calendars on and and you’ll be able to get a better idea of where you fit into our support schedule and what may help you.  again, hang in there and we will get the process right, but sometimes it takes a little bit of time.
Lisa Stack, Support Coordinator