Amber & Edward
- Male factor
- Egg freezing
- Frozen embryo transfer (FET)
- In vitro Fertilization (IVF)
- Robert Kiltz
Amber & Edward's Story:
Our story begins in 2012 when my husband and I had purchased our first home. We had always said that once we got a home, we wanted to start trying for a family. The months kept passing, and no success. We both tried not to look into it too much and tried to continue to go about our lives as normal. In 2016 My husband and I got married and for the months leading up to the wedding we decided to not try for a baby and decided to resume after our wedding. I distinctly remember being on our honeymoon and actively trying for a baby, and feeling so optimistic that we would get pregnant. It became very clear to us after six months that something was wrong. At this point we had spent 4.5 years trying to conceive with just a short break in between. I started going to fertility acupuncture, taking any supplements that were recommended and still no success. I set up an appointment at my OBGYN to try and get some answers as to why we couldn’t conceive. Several blood tests later, hsg testing, and a sperm analysis, we got our answer. “With the condition of your husbands sperm, there is a less than 1% chance you will conceive naturally, give us a call and we can discuss options.” This was the voicemail I got, yes, this news was delivered to us via voicemail. I was at work and missed the call because I was with a client. I started uncontrollably sobbing, I knew our only option was IVF. Then a million questions started racing through my mind: how will we pay for this? How do I deliver this news to my husband? Are we strong enough to get through something like this? Is this a sign we are not meant to have children? As you can imagine, devastation doesn’t even begin to describe this moment in my life. I am a take action kind of girl, anyone close to me will tell you, If Amber wants it, she WILL get it. I immediately started researching to have as much knowledge of IVF as possible before my follow up with my OBGYN to discuss next options. My OBGYN came in the room and handed me a pamphlet to a local IVF DR and proceeded to tell me that due to my weight, I should probably look into a surrogate and that all of her patients that need IVF go to this particular IVF Dr. Little did my OBGYN know, I already called that local Dr. and got a quote of nearly 40 thousand dollars! He also told me that for him to ACCEPT me at his clinic, I would need to loose 60 pounds, or use a surrogate. I politely told my Dr that I was not going to be going to that Dr and handed her back the pamphlet, card, and pen that had that clinics logo on it. I proceed to tell her that I had heard about a clinic called CNY in New York, before I could finish my sentence she interrupted me, “ I’ve heard of them, you get what you pay for so beware.” This was so awkward but I tried to finish out our conversation. I did ask her if she would mind doing my monitoring for me and she told me no because I was not using her “preferred IVF Dr.” I learned that day that the industry of IVF can be a dark, ugly, and money driven arena. I did not let her discourage me and had my phone consult with Dr. Kiltz September 5th of 2017. He was an hour late for our phone call which was alarming to me, but after speaking to this man, all of my worries melted away. Dr. Kiltz spent an hour on the phone with me and answered every question I had, even my absurd ones. He is the warmest, most compassionate, and kind hearted people I have ever had the pleasure of meeting. My husband and I decided not to wait and got our process started right away. By September 30th, my husband and I were in Syracuse ready for egg retrieval. In a matter of 25 days, we were across the country ready to make our babies! 11 eggs retrieved, 9 fertilized, and 6 embryos. We decided on a frozen transfer from the beginning because we wanted to do PGS testing. Of our 6 embryos, 4 came back as normal. We waited for my next period and on October 24th 2017, Dr. Kiltz transferred two embryos. We flew back to southern California that night. Four days post transfer, and I saw a faint line on a pregnancy test. The following morning, there was no denying, WE WERE PREGNANT!!! I will never forget this moment in my life. We waited for our first ultrasound and were sad to see only one of our babies made it, but we were so grateful for our one baby. Allison Everleigh Mata was born on July 8th 2018 at 4:57pm weighing 8 pounds 13 ounces. The most magical moment of my life was holding this precious miracle in my arms. I can not thank Dr. Kiltz and the staff at CNY for their support, love, and compassion. As a travel patient, I highly recommend the CNY experience. My husband and I turned our NY tris into little getaways each time we went. As I mentioned earlier, I am a take charge kind of girl and really advocated for myself during our process. If something seemed unclear to me, I called a nurse. Its relatively simple. I hope that our story can help anyone out there that is possibly thinking of going to CNY,particularly travel patients. IVF is not an easy journey by any means, but I am so grateful I choose CNY for our journey. I am also grateful for all of the women I have met on this journey who uplifted me, guided me, and supported me. My husband and I are #TEAMCNY.
Favorite Team Member at CNY:
As a travel patient, I heavily relied on the nursing staff to guide me. I often worked with nurse Becky. She was always so warm on the phone and sometimes had to explain things to me multiple times in order for me to understand. She never seemed annoyed in anyway by my millions of questions. The day I needed to trigger, I was so nervous I dropped the glass viles with the solution to trigger all over my kitchen floor. Nurse Becky was on the phone with me when this happened and she calmed me down and began thinking of solutions for me. She was able to find a pharmacy in LA where I was able to get a new shot and still trigger and still catch my flight in time for New York. I will never forget how she calmed me while I cried on the phone after I dropped my shot. I am getting teary eye as I type this because she was so kind.
The day of our transfer Dr. Kiltz prayed with my husband and I before our transfer. It was so powerful to have my medical provider connect with my husband and I also on a spiritual level as well as provide medical treatment. He is so passionate about what he does and truly believes that everyone should have the opportunity to have a baby.
Helpful resources Amber & Edward found:
I joined as many CNY facebook groups as possible and found lots of support from the women in those groups, some of which I have become friends with for life.
The high of our story is of course our baby girl, but also how close my husband and I have become from this journey. Its so powerful what you and your partner can achieve while on the journey of IVF. I also feel that we were meant to go through this to be able to help others. I have been so open about our IVF process on our social media outlets and I have guided so many women who have reached out to me privately to tell me they are struggling. I know I was meant to go through this to provide those women with hope and knowledge. I would say the low of our story would be when I dropped our trigger shot and had to get a new one before catching our flight to LA. ( craziest 4 hours of my life!)
Hope, Inspiration and Advice:
If I could provide any advice, it would be to always find the silver lining. IVF sucks, plain and simple, its a sisterhood no one wants to be a part of, but somehow we find ourselves there. Try and find the good, even if its the smallest glimmer of something good. Remember its ok to be mad, angry, or upset sometimes its normal. Be kind to yourself.
I am so glad I did not let what some people would say about CNY discourage me. In a perfect world, CNY would make everyone happy. This is not a perfect world and there will always be some people who have a bad experience. I just feel that it is not ok to bash a clinic and diminish hope for other women who need CNY. I am one of those women who needed CNY. I was turned away from other clinics. CNY welcomed me with open arms. So ladies, done let the negative get in your head, If I did, I wouldn't have my precious baby girl sleeping right next to me as I type this.