April's Journey to Fertility: Week Twenty Three


Fertility SymbolApril is a CNY Fertility Center patient and has been on her journey to fertility for approximately two years. April will share candid stories and a unique perspective on the fertility challenges many women and couples face.
Week Twenty Three: De-cluttering
As Erin McCullough put it during my recent Maya Abdominal Massage (MAM), it is important to do what nurtures our spirit and promotes our own personal growth. In other words, surrounding myself with positive opportunities and experiences is essential to my well-being. I had just informed Erin that there was a work commitment that was not going well, and because I was becoming consistently frustrated by this particular commitment, I had to make a choice. In this instance, I had to resign from an extra curricular commitment. This responsibility was not worth the anxiety it was causing me. Nor was it worth the monetary stipend I would receive in June had I fulfilled my commitment.
Please note, I am not saying that we should simply toss aside our commitments whenever they become too demanding (otherwise, how many of us would still be working toward motherhood?). Before I resigned from this extra curricular position, I discussed how I was feeling with my husband and close co-workers who all had the same encouraging thoughts, which were to focus on what was best for me. In this case, I needed to de-clutter my commitments a bit and reconnect with what was important to me. I concluded that first and foremost, I have one incredibly valuable priority right now – to work on my overall well-being so I can achieve a healthy pregnancy. Working is important, too, but taking on an extra curricular activity that causes me angst and frustration is not healthy or helpful. Instead of complaining or being upset, I mindfully decided to move forward by leaving something behind.
Now that I have let go of this commitment, I wonder if there is anything else I need to de-clutter?  I often have incredibly overwhelming “to-do” lists, but maybe that is because I have committed to do too much or because I have not said no enough. As I work through this week, I am going to be mindful of what I am doing and why I am doing what I am doing. How often do we go through the motions, become frustrated and find little reward from our efforts?
I have one intention for you this week. Please consider whether you are being rewarded by your efforts or if you are finding that the end result of some efforts is only frustration and angst. If you find that the latter is the case in any instance, why not examine what is causing you distress and decide if you can let go of a commitment or two? You may replace one commitment with another more rewarding one, perhaps a commitment that nurtures your spirit and encourages personal growth. Or you may simply welcome the time and space that is left after you have let go of an obligation.
April all Year
Below are links to April’s past articles in case you missed any of them:
Week twenty two: The Voice from Within
Week twenty one: Marital Bliss Part II
Week twenty: Marital bliss and infertility
Week nineteen: The changing seasons
Week eighteen: Grand Opening
Week seventeen: Trust your place
Week sixteen: Labels
Week fifteen: Keeping the faith
Week fourteen: Keep at it
Week thirteen: Maya Abdominal Massage
Week twelve: Acupuncture
Week eleven: A little bit at a time
Week ten: Well-timed reminders
Week nine: Summertime
Week eight: Resiliency
Week seven: Tiny miracles
Week six: Bahama Mama
Week five: The right path for us
Week four: Our fertility treatment “break”
Week three: Deliberate choices
Week two: This moment
Week one: My story