April is a CNY Fertility Center patient and has been on her journey to fertility for approximately two and a half years. April will share candid stories and a unique perspective on the fertility challenges many women and couples face. CNY Fertility Center has locations in Syracuse, Albany and Rochester, NY.
Week 44: This Broken Road
At the recent Parenthood for Me fundraiser, Dr. Kiltz said a few words about a couple who told him they were glad they had never been successfully treated for infertility: the reason? The couple never would have adopted their child who they love and could not imagine their lives without. Later in the week I connected this meaningful story with the lyrics to a song I recently heard.
On my way home from work, I happened to catch a phrase on our local country music channel as I was flipping through the stations: “God blessed this broken road that led me straight to you.” For those of you who are not familiar with the song, its title is God Bless the Broken Road by Rascal Flatts. I almost never listen to country music, and I am certainly glad the DJ announced the title of the song as well as the band name. (Yes, I know some of you may be appalled at my lack of knowledge regarding this popular band. I really do have to expand my musical horizons!) But I just had to listen to the entire song. The lyrics are about someone who couldn’t understand the grander plan until he reached the end of his road to love. And although this is a love song, being a mother is about love, too. And we all want to find our little loves.
I thought about how my and my husband’s last three years have resembled a broken road with many cracks (blood tests, ultra sounds, consults) bumps (lack of resilience and exhaustion), faded areas (hopelessness) and potholes (failed cycles). The song goes on to say how the narrator “got lost a time or two”, but wiped his brow and “kept pushing through.” I remember driving in the car thinking about how all who are on their journeys to fertility must keep pushing through.
There is also a line that will sum up our journeys once we achieve motherhood: “Every long lost dream led me to where you are.” I know we feel as if our dreams are unattainable and that the road we are traveling is simply too broken and filled with loss for our hearts to handle, but we aren’t there yet. We have to keep going. We have to keep working toward our dream because when we look back on these difficult journeys, we will bless the broken roads that have led us to our children.
On the journey together,
April All Year
Below are links to April’s past articles in case you missed any of them: