With the hubbub of the holidays past I was curious as to how many of us make a New Year’s Resolution and my Google search revealed about 70% of people do. The article goes on to share that within a few weeks of the New Year an overwhelming majority of people leave their resolutions behind. Hmmm… I have to admit that I was part of the overwhelming majority prior to my shift. The shift was from making “resolutions” which seem so final to me; to creating a “Dream’s List”.
What resolutions means to me is that I’m going to resolve, “not to do something” or “change a behavior” that is deemed negative. The eradication of a bad behavior just feels plain wrong to me. I’ll tell you why. Good vs. bad doesn’t help us to vibrate at our highest potential; it creates the judgment of the duality rather than the acceptance and acknowledge of the duality. The shift was to something new and came in the form of a “Dream’s Listing and Goal Setting.” Creating goals for the year with the positive in mind shifts the focus off the bad behavior, to that of instilling a habit that is for the highest good. For example, my first goal is directly correlated with the four-letter “F” word. FEAR! The fear that I am discussing is presented as worry. Worry for my children’s safety, worry for the completion of deadlines, worry for the smoothness of a schedule. I found myself being critical of my “worrying” and focusing on the worry instead of the dual side of worry, trust and faith. My first goal for 2010 was to Trust in the Process to help me with this goal I say “Trust & Faith Is My Way.”
Thinking back to the heat of our fertility journey, the worry had almost eradicated my faith and trust in the process. The worry about the appropriate elevations of my hormone levels, the worry about the specimen, the worry about “missing the opportunity to create a baby” was what was in the forefront. Worry a.k.a. Fear. Sir Isaac Newton’s Third’s Law of Motion is “To every action there is an equal and opposite reaction.” I am asking you to think about the opposite reaction to the negative and release the tone of resolutions of what you “should” be doing and make a shift yourself.
Dr. Rob will be beginning the 2nd Part of the Love and Infertility Workshop Series at the end of the month in Syracuse on Saturday, January 30, 2010. The intention of Part Two will be to focus on Your Dream’s List and create new habits of thinking and approaching your current life situation with a focus on Gratitude. Please RSVP Kristen@cnyfertility.com. To see more information on this event click here.